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So someone who has failed in love is qualified to give love advice?


In short? Yes.

This is America. Everyone's an expert, even on things they've never done.

And if I may point out the obvious, everyone fails in love until they succeed. And then when they succeed, and try to give advice as someone who has "made it to the other side," people yell at them that they don't remember what it's like to be single.

The real answer is that there's no set of love guidelines or rules or catchphrases. There are generalizations, sure. But I believe that every situation is different, and therefore, there's no real cramming for the final exam...


I really dislike love advice. Sure there are genralization, but when it comes to my life i like it to be a little more personal and specific. But to each his own i guess. I don't understand how if one has found love thay can give advice to others, it's not like fixing your car it's different for everyone.

writersbloc gal

heh, i'm with Petitedov on this. you can't create a formula for a unique experience.. yes, there are generalizations that can be made, but somehow, none of my friends relationships came out of these generalizations - all seemed exceptions to the rule.


I followed the Blair saga for awhile until it got inane. She is not at all qualified to give advice. It isn't necessarily because she hasn't found love, but I have seen the advice she gives on her site and it isn't good. Her quest became solely a marketing gimmick for her workshops and whatever else it is that she is selling. Sorry, Blair, you'll get no money from me.


I used to be very curious about Blaire but now I'm much more curious about the suckers paying Blaire for, of all things, love advice.


Today's post on my blog is about Blaire. (See I've been following her "updates" and each time I sit down to read one, I am compelled to smoke a cigarette so that I don't throw my laptop out the window.

One of my readers actually attended Blair's recent "workshop" (their comments can be found on my blog) and let's just say they weren't at all impressed.

I find her stories and advice frighteningly self-absorbed and grossly one-sided. Each letter is the same, with the person seeking advice giving a very one-sided version of a somewhat twisted story. Blaire immediately takes their side, maligns the "other person" and then pontificates for 5 paragrpahs until she gets to her sales pitch.

Guy are supposed to jump through hoops to impress her. One guy didn't call her the next day after their first date, so she wrote him off. Then there are the multiple crash and burn relationships she has that last for 6 weeks and then end abruptly. And everything is always the man's fault. Blaire takes zero responsibility for any of it. It couldn't possibly be that Blaire has inordinate expectations.

Blaire's problem is that she constructs unscaleable walls and expects men to hurtle themselves over them in order to meet her expectations. doesn't work like that, Blaire. What I sense is really going on is that Blaire refuses to take any risks because she's insecure, so she writes a ridiculous wish list of criteria that men must meet in order to woo her. Which , of course, leads to Blaire never having to open up and letting someone in.

We all have our issues...but it's those who can identify them, admit to them, communicate them and work on them that are qualified to give advice. You don't have to be married, engaged or coupled up to write about dating or emotional intimacy...but you do have to be self-aware. Blaire? Isn't. And becasue she isn't she doesn't have the rational perspective required to give advice.

The harsh reality that Blaire needs to face is that she's needy, shallow and insecure. Men, you know, kinda don't dig that.


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