MY URBAN KVETCH

"We Have No Deeds" - On Connecting to Community and Activism (cross-post)

[cross-posted from ROICommunity]

In California, I'm in a strange time warp. Right now it's before noon local time. It's about 3pm in New York. And it's 10pm in Israel. Which means my Israeli friends are now past Kol Nidre, the opening prayer of Yom Kippur; New Yorkers are trying to finish up any last-minute prep for the holiday; and I'm still sitting here at the computer, finishing breakfast and wondering how the fast will go this year. And to an extent, I'm experiencing them all at the same time (except, obviously, fasting and eating), because people in our network are extensions of ourselves.

The nature of community in the technology age is an entirely new entity. Can people be there for each other, in good times and bad, across miles and without physically uttering any words of support, comfort and companionship?

Recently, I noticed that the Jewish community offline (and to an extent, it's online sibling) mobilizes best around tragedy. Protests, vigils, memorial services - we never miss them. We commemorate loss by gathering, having moments of silence, praying, lighting candles, creating emergency hotlines, petition campaigns, calling Congresspeople, crafting contingency plans, and framing it all within a fundraising appeal. There's no way around that, to an extent - money makes plans possible. But it also gives us an action plan over things that are events, unchangeable because they're in the past, or a future that feels beyond our control.

Connecting to Jewish Community: In-Person and Online

This is a tough time of year, for anyone who's encountered loss in the last year, for anyone suffering from the weight of their own circumstances, for anyone who feels restricted in movement, stagnant or inert in some way. It's a tough time for people who have a tendency (or an overabundance of free time) to think about their lives, how they got to be where they are, and what they'd like to change in the months ahead. 

The liturgy feeds the introspection, urging us to go deeper and deeper into ourselves, even as most of us do so in a crowded synagogue with many people who won't show up there again until next Yom Kippur. For some, this connection is organic and part of their calendar year. They show up as long as they are able.

But what if they're not able? What if circumstances - emotional or physical or financial - preclude their ability to seek out synagogue services for Yom Kippur? Some communities might organize other congregants to hold a mini-minyan in the home of someone who can't travel to a synagogue. But most don't. 

And so it is to fill this void that technology can step in, helping people connect to the holiday and feel like a part of a community in a way that doesn't embarrass them, or bankrupt them, or cause them additional emotional or physical pain.

This week, as I've been helping JewishTVNetwork.com to promote their online Kol Nidre service, I've heard and read reactions ranging from enthusiasm to vehement opposition. There are discussions around such services, as to whether they're diluting or canceling the messages of the holiday, or whether they are permissible according to Conservative halakhah. 

Contemplating Tashlich: Bus, Beach, Bread

[Tashlich is a ritual of repentance in which Jews take bread, representing their sins, and throw them into a moving body of water, in a symbolic gesture of rejection. This year, I did tashlich on the beach next to the Santa Monica Pier.]

Back on a bus after my week with a convertible, my flash-in-the-pan-all-is-vanity car, mine on loan from a friend like a body from God, God who presides over all things – body, convertible, deeds, punishment, and repentance. 

The Day of Judgment looms. After two days of sumptuous meals, round challahs dripping a mess of honey over my holiday clothes and oozing through my fingers, after two days of wishing people a good year, the mood drops from a cheer to a whisper. Somber tones conquer conversations, as people wish you a good fast, or meaningful fast, when really, what it means is you’ll be hungry, or thirsty, more likely, as you sit and stand and sit and stand invoking mercy and compassion from the One True Judge. 

But that’s next week. Today, down by the water’s edge, I pray for the opposite of the holiday. I pray for no judgment at all. I’ve tried to do what’s right this year, but there is so seldom a path that is clearly straight and narrow, and any judge worth his salt – and let’s face it, God deals his salt in pillars – would consider the evidence and have to return a verdict of guilty. 

That’s the point, isn’t it? That behind our blogs and sunglasses and convertibles, we’re all, always, guilty. Every year. 

That’s why I’m heading back to the beach, not for sun and fun, but to dig into self in stead of in sand, hoping even within my Judaism for some holy baptismal moment. In that immersive instant, as my shoes slip off, feet into soft sand, then approach the sea, where they submerge and are washed until they’re…something. Dirt on my feet, even when freshly emerged from water, indicates that just because you’ve washed something doesn’t mean it’s truly clean. 

Nominating, Defining and Voting for Our Heroes

United Jewish Communities reminds us all that today's the last chance (Tuesday, 9/22, 11:59pm EST) to submit names for people who are your Jewish community heroes - after this stage, 20 semi-finalists will be named and the competition for the $25,000 of project funding will continue. (Text of the UJC-sent letter is below.)

As the voting continues, we should be considering heroism's broad and ever-expanding definition. What makes a hero for the ages, and what makes a personal hero? Is there a difference between the person who is "your hero," and people who may be unsung, courageous members of the community? What is the role of social media savvy in launching a campaign to be a hero? Does crowdsourcing heroism lead to more awareness of the individuals with heroic qualities who surround us, or will the popular kids win? 

When you look at the nominees, you'll see that neither situation is bad, per se - all the nominees are deserving. Whoever wins will receive a reward for their efforts. And a few will receive honorable mentions. But then there are the dozens of others who were recognized locally for what seemed like a minute or two, and then will slip back into community anonymity. Even after the contest's conclusion, what can we do to keep recognizing and providing support to the heroes with a small "h" on the local and personal level?

Here's the text of the letter.

Tonight, Tuesday 9/22, at 11:59pm, Eastern Time, we will close the call for new nominees to the Jewish Community Heroes contest as we continue toward the next stage: naming the 20 semi-finalists. 

If you've been thinking about nominating a friend, neighbor or community member who is selflessly working to improve the world -- now is your last chance. 

Nominating your hero is a great way to tell someone "thank you" for his or her hard work on behalf of your community, and it's an opportunity to help raise awareness about a project or cause you care about. So take a minute and nominate your hero today: 

http://www.jewishcommunityheroes.org/lastchance

Don't forget, the finalists will also be honored at the UJC General Assembly in Washington, DC, and the Hero of the Year will earn a $25,000 investment for a community service project or nonprofit organization. So nominate your Hero today, and start spreading the word! 

Starting Off the New Year With...

...introspection?

...reflection?

...contemplation of the year gone by and repentance for the areas where we fell short?

NOPE. (At least not in this post.) Instead of all those things, see how a Michael Jackson parody video transforms into something even more horrifying...

Keep your eyes on the little boy with the Coke-bottle glasses. He's got "breakout star" written all over him.

(on Twitter, via Hadassah Sabo Milner, of InThePink)

 

Because We're All Hippies Inside: Hug It Out For Peace

Hug it out, kids. In case you were wondering, "is that guy just thinking real hard, or is he actually nonverbally requesting a hug?" now you can read people's body language and determine if the person in question wants a hug.

Who's the Hug Instructor? (You know that's a real title somewhere...) Yoni Stadlin, from Eden Village Camp.

What's the occasion? The UN-sanctioned International Day of Peace, which falls every September 21. Which happens to be tomorrow.

Who's the Real Rosh Hashanah Girl?

When you think of Rosh Hashanah Girl, you probably think of the brilliant video co-created by Brooklynites (and ROIers) William "the Jewish Robot" Levin and singer/songwriter Michelle Citrin. And you should. Because who could compete with that, really?

But what many people don't know is that I rocked Rosh Hashanah first. This classic clip is an interview that the very funny Teresa Strasser did several years ago (before she was exploiting her baby) when she lived in New York and worked for Good Day NY - because the network decided that talking to rabbis about Jewish holidays was a little boring, they opted for a fresher voice...

There was initially talk of my becoming GoodDay's "Go-To-Jew," who'd come in periodically and talk about Jewish life and holidays. That didn't happen for whatever reasons, probably including the fact that Teresa moved back to LA. But that was my first real TV appearance, and now that I'm a seasoned professional living in Los Angeles, you never know what the future will bring. (You hear that, future? Bring it.)

While we're on Rosh Hashanah as a topic, let me remind you of a Yom Kippur option for people who can't get to (or don't feel comfortable going to) synagogue: I'm helping JewishTVNetwork to promote their online Kol Nidre service, which will air online erev Yom Kippur (September 27) live from Los Angeles. For more information, contact me (esther.kustanowitz at gmail) and/or click over to the special High Holidays page of the JewishTVNetwork.com site, which also has links to relevant video clips, recipes and more!

9/11 Again

Feels like not so long ago I was sharing these reflections, but apparently, it's been another year. Which makes it 8 years. That's two consecutive college educations (for most people who aren't on a five-year plan), two Presidential terms, two years short of a decade - gone. Where did the days go? Slowly at first, then just...past.

Now I'm in a new city, still thinking of that day, and all the days since; the lives lost, still others wrecked in a hundred different ways. Who knows what 9/11 means in the land of Hollywood dreams and plastic surgery nightmares? On a day like today, driving back from the airport after dropping off a friend at 6am, I hear the words on the radio: "on this day, 8 years ago," and I change the channel. It's still dark in Los Angeles, there's barely a glimmer of light at horizon's edge, and I can't face the anniversary until the sunlight arrives. I just can't.

As I parallel park across the street from my apartment, the sun's turned the sky pinkish. The day's here, no denying it now. Checking Facebook, wishing some friends happy birthday before reading through the rest of the updates on my status feed: "is remembering," "is thinking about people who died."

Amid the more generic expressions, there is shocking specificity:

"...remembers Nancy, 32."

"What people don't remember: That when you stood there, there was paper from the offices flying all around. I re...member a Far Side cartoon that was probably in someone's cubicle. It landed in my passenger seat, through the sun roof."

A news report over RSS: the National September 11 Memorial and Museum, due to open in 2013 underground to the new World Trade Center buildings currently under development, has the 19 hijackers' martyrdom tapes, and is making quotations and photos of the hijackers available in the museum to show the day from the terrorists' perspective. The Museum's president said these photos would "be displayed along with the quotes as part of the 'witness testimony' in the museum," and added, "no one will come to this museum and leave with a feeling of heroism for the people who committed the crimes that we bear witness to today,"

We all mourn differently, as loss never really vanishes. Is everyone a New Yorker today, I wonder, or is that an artificial way of connecting to something more intensely local than you are, by proclaiming solidarity? Will I go to the September 11 museum, and if I do, will the dread that fills me be similar to the cloud that descends before I go to any Holocaust museum in any state or country? And when at the end of the day, we're still facing a hole in the skyline, have so many more questions than answers, and feel the scars throb as we remember, how can we ever effectively reflect and remember?

Really? Bernie Madoff: The Musical

I wish I were kidding. But I'm not (via eJewishPhilanthropy).

   

It's one of three scenes, so I should probably watch the whole thing before I criticize it, but when it comes to rhymed musical parody, I've got really high standards, and unfortunately, this doesn't meet them. (Although I know Yale would say the same about me, so touche.)

The other issue I have might fall under the heading of "too soon." Hearing all of Bernie's sins laid out in the familiar song gave me a bit of indigestion - I know too many people and organizations affected by Madoff's years of scheming to be able to laugh it all away with a song like this one.

Don't throw tomatoes at me for being overly critical: when it comes to creative (and admittedly, somewhat weird) Madoff-skewering,  no one beats Woody Allen. Plus, I've just watched another outstanding episode of "Glee," and I still can't forget "HP: The Musical." I think I'd just like Jewish a cappella - even good Jewish a cappella - to somehow be less nerdy than it is. And maybe that's unfair. But that's how I feel. 

[Ducks, as the crowd begins to pelt her with rotten fruit.]

Revolver Rabbis?: Packin' Heat for Rosh Hashanah

When you talk about the caliber of a rabbi, you're usually not talking about the size of his gun. But this year, that might just change, as a Queens group of rabbis has decided to embark upon a program that trains them in pistol-packing, gun-grabbing and the tumbling and table-flipping that you typically see on TV and in the movies. The goal is to protect themselves, their congregations and worshippers against potential terror attacks.  

Oh how I wish there were no need for stories like this one. But since the stories exist, my hope for him is that the table he's taking shelter behind is bulletproof. Also, allow me to offer another option - a new client of mine, Jewish Television Network organized a live broadcast of a Kol Nidre service last year that was viewed by ove r

Also, it occurs to me that with synagogue singing and the presence of guns, we're actually taking a step back toward "Cop Rock." (With less synth, of course.)

If this story has scared you away from synagogues entirely, or you're otherwise unable to get there for Yom Kippur this year, you might want to check out (new client) Jewish TV Network's live Kol Nidre service, being broadcast on September 27 - it's also an opportunity to experience the amazing Rabbi Naomi Levy and her congregation Nashuva ("a soulful community of prayer in action"), which gets amazing reviews from people here in LA (I haven't been yet, but I've met her and she's really inspiring).

May we all be inscribed in the book of life.