Choosing to Do the New

"You look happy, like you're breathing easier."

"You're so skinny! You look great!"

"You've got some great color in your face."

There's something within me that's changed. The scale will gleefully deny its involvement, and thanks to copious amounts of sunblock and obsessive hat-wearing in the Holy Land, the reality is that my face is no more or less rosy than it was when I left in May. But still, there are reasons a person can look different.

Because certain decisions have been made, for example. Because I'm learning to deal differently with difficult issues that come up instead of letting them fester. Because opportunities have popped up that make me realize I have an abundance of riches to choose from. Because family is supportive and providing new opportunities to celebrate. Because people seek my input on things I care about. Because I'm part of the conversation, because I can contribute skills to the projects and people who are rising up meet the Jewish future. Because change is imminent, and scary, and exciting.

Looking back, I think the whole quest-for-change-thing started when I chose a new phone last year. I could have gone with silver--it was what I'm used to, and goes with everything, it's unobtrusive and functional, and really, why go with something flashy when you can go with something classic? But that day, I gave into a whim, and purchased an orange phone, embracing a flash of whimsical color in a monochrome life.

I think it began that moment, when I identified that there was a pattern of sameness that was comforting, but unexciting and unstimulating. It was easy, because maintaining the status quo always is easier than choosing something unusual or unknown. There's this double-edged sword called inertia that traps us all: items and people in motion stay in motion, and those at rest remain sedentary. So, I'm choosing to overcome intertia of the second definition in favor of the first; choosing to change toward a new trajectory.

Predictably, people want to know what I'm going there FOR. "Why Los Angeles?" "What's the new job?" "Are you pitching a screenplay?" There is no new job. I'm in the fortunate position to have steady clients, for whom the work happens over the phone and the internet--which I can do from anywhere. And as for the "why L.A.?" question, my basic answer is "why not?"  The weather's better, it's a big city with a big, young creative Jewish population, and thanks to an immense social network, I have some people there I know well, and others I'd like to know better. I will miss my family, who are all East Coasters, but I'll visit, and it's a great comfort to know that I won't be lonely in Los Angeles, a statement I can make solely because technology has so enabled me.

As for the industry, I won't say it's not an attractor. If someone invites me to the Emmys or Oscars, it's not like I'm going to say no. And I appreciate the confidence of my friends, that I have what it takes creatively to create and pitch a screenplay. There are definitely creative things (Groundlings and UCBT, you're on notice) that I'd like to do while I'm in LA. But I'm not under any delusions that my simple act of moving across the country will yield some sort of industry-related opportunity, especially since I have friends who have been plugging away toward Hollywood careers for years with little or no success. I know it's a tough business, and it's not my primary goal to fight and scratch my way in. But my being there allows me to be present on the fringes of a world that I've long wondered about. (Maybe it's time to test that Jews in Hollywood thing.)

And then there's the other thing. Writing about NYC Jewish singles for nearly five years had me Bradshaw-wondering if the issues were local, indigenous to large cities with large Jewish populations, or nationwide. In exploring Jewish single life, perhaps for a book that seems to be perpetually in proposal stage, I think a wider scope of experience might serve my personal needs and my propel my professional purpose. I spent several months in Jerusalem, and became fixated on Srugim, the TV show about Orthodox Jewish singles. The issues were the same as on the Upper West Side, but with an Israeli accent. Are the issues the same in Los Angeles, but with a "dude..." fixed on the end of every sentence? Or does the industry's premium on beauty and youth invade the dating scene, creating impossible standards with a distinctly West Coast flavor?

It's time to embrace change, and hope that inertia, my social network, and the California sunshine do the rest. I'm choosing to do the new. And I'm excited to see what happens next.

Comments

[ahuvah]

i cannot wait to hear all about LA! West Coast here you come!

[Benji Lovitt]

Good luck! Don't forget the little people!

[Marnie]

Nesiah tovah and can't wait 'til you're here!

[T.A.B.]

Good luck to you, Esther!

[Wine Tasting Guy]

Sounds exciting. Best of luck with the new location & digs. I'm sure it will be an amazing experience...

And remember, HAVE FUN!!!

[EstherK]

Thanks so much, everyone. I'll be sure to keep this space updated. Although I'll have to change how it looks a bit to stay current with my environment, I'll be sure to stay the same inside. Thanks again for your good wishes (from this really representative sample of friends/readers).

[Neil]

And the Coffee Bean in LA is kosher!

[Julia Gliner]

i'm coming with you!

[Marcy]

Yay, E!

[Petitedov]

Just as I'm about to move to nyc...you move to LA! Gah! Hope the transition is a smooth one! I love the orange phone - i don't know if it is a coincidence but whenever I comeback from Israel people notice a change within in me as well. I hope the enthusiasm stays with you for a long time.

[Chavi]

All I can say is Good Luck! With you moving West, I don't know if we'll ever meet :) I'm a Middle and East U.S. kinda gal, myself.

But really, do well, be well. You'll rock no matter where you are!

[Isophorone]

So now you will LITERALLY be able to spend Hanukkah in Santa Monica! LOL

Best of luck with the move and your new work; please keep us posted.

Since you are moving to LA, does this mean you will have to get a car? Or do you already have one?

[EstherK]

Neil, I think Coffee Bean is always kosher, no? Or maybe I've just been to Jerusalem and LA branches...

Julia, come on! All the cool kids are doing it.

M, thanks. :)

Petitedov, I think there's something about the Israel experience that changes you, even in a slight way people can't quite put their fingers on. My leaving NYC has nothing to do with your plans to arrive here. I'm sad to be missing co-citying with you!

Chavi, I feel that we will meet someday. I am moving to a major city, after all...

lsophorone, I do hope to avoid the cliche of Hanukkah in Santa Monica. I'll stick to gin-and-tonica. I believe (if all goes well this week) I have a car.

Will keep you all posted. Thanks so much for your good wishes!!

[Gila]

Good luck!

[Chris M]

Great news Esther, I think you are ready for a change. How are you driving out? US 40? If so and you need a place to crash (I live on the way in Raleigh NC) lemme know! Maybe I can bum a ride to Vegas too while we are at it.

[curleegirlee]

Good for you! Funny and crazy how a bold cell phone choice could escalate to a move across the country! (On a side note, I have that same orange phone also, and it definitely makes a statement.)

Good luck in LA - I look forward to hearing (reading) what new and different experiences you encounter in a new city!