I've caught bits and pieces of the VMAs tonight, and here are my thoughts, in no particular order.
1) Dude. Those guys on the treadmill? Madd skillz.
2) Paris Hilton? And she's starting to look and sound too much like the South Park version of Paris Hilton, and that's when you know you've become a caricature. Her mere presence here is an affront to my sense of all that is good and decent in this world...
3) Which means that so is Nicole Richie.
4) I love that Pink won for a video that totally just made fun of all the other nominees. "I don't want to act like...that..."
5) I might be imagining it, but I think I just saw my brother's hand on TV--he's backstage at the VMAs holding cue cards or something.
6) Dear Janet Jackson, are you missing your Rhythm Nation dancers? I think Beyonce's got them. Love, MTV.
7) Ringtone of the Year? That's a category? In the old days, MTV used to play music videos. And the VMAs used to honor videos. And now we're giving an award to a ringtone? And what's with all the rap and hip-hop? And how does the incredibly catchy "Golddigger" not win, but "My Humps" does? Just because Fergie's got good abs? These kids these days...they wouldn't know good music if it bit them in the patootie. OK...I think it's official. I just became a geezer.
8) Al Gore at the VMAs, following up a "SexyBack" joke with a global warming mini-lecture? Now I've seen everything.
Which means it's time to turn this sucker off.