Exodus: The Cruise for Jews

This week's Torah portion happens to be Exodus, the book of the Bible that sets up the Jewish people in slavery in Egypt; as the chapters take us through the story, the Jews are redeemed and taken on a journey toward redemption and their homeland Land of Israel. And although I don't yet have a ticket to Israel, it is perhaps metaphorically fitting that this week kicks off a season of bringing the message of Kvetch to other locations, as I journey to places that are both emotionally, logistically and geographically far from my regular Urb.

Over the course of the next few days, my transportation methods will be significantly altered. I'll somehow manage to transition from urine-scented subways to the comfort of a dad-driven car that will whisk me away to the bustle of the airport. Two coffees later, I'll enter a plane in New York, and magically emerge in Florida. After some time with family, I'll leave from a port of embarkation for even sunnier climes, hopefully leaving woolen scarves and hats on the boat while--under cover of heavy sunscreen--I explore the exotic ports of call I've been promised. Taxi cabs and SUVs will recede into memory as I embrace my new transportation vehicles: cruise ships and catamarans. Tropical drinks are invited to join me poolside, whenever they want to. I'll be meeting new people from new places, and settling into the relaxation of a Caribbean cruise which will ooze all of its rhyming counterparts (Jews, schmooze, booze, jacuzz, etc.). And if there is karaoke, mark my words, it will be had.

The "blogging guru" is after some high seas adventure. Which means less frequent posting. But don't worry, my friends. You will all be with me in spirit, which should make you feel much more relaxed, especially during the really expensive massage I might just indulge in.

So if your boss asks you one more time about those TPS reports, just place your interlaced hands behind your head, lean back in your ergonomically designed office chair, and say, "Shhh. I'm on a cruise with Esther...I'll get back to you in a week."

"Sea" you soon, my friends.

Comments

[Jobber]

Esther love how is that you are not spoken for? U are so lucious, so Jewlicous, so sun shinny attractive? Just reading your stream of being now has engulfed me w/ the sweet love of your essence.

[RobbieR]

I WANNA BE ON THE CRUISE WITH ESTHER!!!

Rob

[Some Loser]

Have fun Esther and have a drink by the pool for me!!!

[annabel lee]

Nesiah tovah! Have a fantastic (Jewtastic?) time on the cruise!! Can't wait to see you and hear all about it in person! OK, that was *way* too many exclamation points. I've calmed down now.

[ken]

Watch out for the pirates!

[Esther in Boca...]

Hey gang, would love to take you all with me. Unfortunately, budget does not allow. But I'll try to post updates that will allow you some access to the action. (Not that kind of action. Hmm...well, maybe that kind of action. I'll be discreet.)

Thanks for your good wishes. I've invited some guest bloggers to fill in for me here and at JDaters Anonymous, so hopefully there will be fresh content here even if the cruise's internet access is sucky.

Have a good week, everyone.

[Andrea]

While you're there Zach Braff and Mandy Moore are going public with their relationship!

We let him slip through our fingers.

[Jobber]

Blog to us, Oh Beautiful Esther, shower us with your words of glory.

Go to the Internet room on the boat, just for 10 minutes, give us of your sunshiney Carribean love.

Oh, bring me some Players Rum if
you can find it there?

I'll pay you write away. U can mail I jes got a PO Box today. I love that rum, it is the best. I found it when I was in Amsterdam recently, and I can't find it in the "land of the free".

Write Away we miss you badly,

Love,

Jobber

[New music m]

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