Mimi Rogers. Yes, (the pre-Andi McDowell) she who was married to Senor Smile in the 80s, has weighed in on the TomKat behemoth. To sum up, she thinks they're for real, and doesn't see what the big idea is. Oh yeah, and she likes to use sarcasm at points that will ensure that someone misquotes her:
"OK, he and Katie fell in love, they're getting married. Why is this in the news? Why is this a big deal? Is there something unusual about meeting someone and falling in love?"
Umm, yes. That's why everyone wants to fall in love, because it is so unusual. Mim, let me 'splain you sumthin: it's not like the couple has known each other for years or even worked together. They met, they dated for three seconds and then got engaged, right around the time that both had blockbuster movies coming out. And that's why it's in the news.
"He needs so much help career-wise."
Watch the sarcasm. Someone's gonna take that out of context. (Proposed Enquirer headline: "Rogers Thinks Ex Cruise 'Needs Help'")
"Here's the thing, you're the biggest movie star in the world, you've got a gazillion dollars, why does he need to do anything? (Is he) like, 'Let's see, I'm the biggest movie star in the world. I have a gazillion dollars I need to do a fake wedding.' Explain that to me."
Well, I will explain to you what "grammatically vetting your quotes means." First "you're the biggest star," then "why does he need to..." This is just confusing. Plus, I would like to know how many zeroes are in a gazillion.
"Let's look at Katie Holmes: 'I'm 26, I'm gorgeous, I have a huge movie that just opened (BATMAN BEGINS), I've got like 10 million offers. I need to have a fake marriage.'
I don't think that the marriage is that premeditatedly fake, per se. It's just stupid. How much time have these two spent getting to know each other? How are they in love so fast? Is infatuation with a former pinup on your wall (Cruise on Holmes' wall) and an older man's literal grasping onto youth (in the form of the former Joey Potter) love? And more importantly, might Cruise require Ritalin? We already know he's dyslexic, and has managed to overcome great odds to get as far as he has with a reading disability. Having recently reseen Magnolia, I still think he's a great actor. He's just a little wacky, as celebs tend to be (trust me on this). Now, he's like, been megadosed with the wacky. After all, he "knows the history of psychiatry" better than Matt Lauer.*
"Maybe they fell in love and they're getting married... It's the only rational answer that I can come up with."
In a related story, in the event that acting roles become too sparse, Rogers will be accepting a position at a local college as a professor of logic and philosophy.
*NEW YORK (AP) -- Tom Cruise criticized NBC ''Today'' show host Matt Lauer on Friday when Lauer mentioned Cruise's earlier criticism of Brooke Shields for taking anti-depressants. Cruise told Lauer he didn't know what he was talking about. ''You don't know the history of psychiatry. I do,'' Cruise said.
The interview became more heated when Lauer, who said he knew people who had been helped by the attention-deficit disorder drug Ritalin, asked Cruise about the effects of the drug.
''Matt, Matt, you don't even -- you're glib,'' Cruise responded. ''You don't even know what Ritalin is. If you start talking about chemical imbalance, you have to evaluate and read the research papers on how they came up with these theories, Matt, OK. That's what I've done.''